Shitty Golfer

[Verse 1] I’m a shitty golfer you can ask my wife I’ve been out there hackin’ every day of my life I got the shorts and all the plaid sweaters and this new taylormade driver didn’t make me any better Man I hit ’em fat and I hit ’em thin I roll ’em in the bunker’s man I hit ’em again                                          Slice ’ in the bushes crank ’ in creek I popped that sucker up and hooked it out on the street [Chorus] Yeah I’m 245 right down the middle and I’ll miss the green to the left just a little Chili dip a wedge and put it all together Hit that son of a bitch right up there in the leather If you call that good and let me press on the side You can put me down for a five [Verse 2] Hey I’m a shitty golfer most of us are But we carry our clubs in the back of our cars What else you gonna do when your out of town and you need to waste a whole day and shoot another round Man I played Augusta and I played Pebble Beach and one time at Sawgrass I shot 83 If I live long enough to be 88 I think I’ll celebrate it by shooting my age [Chorus] Yeah I’m 245 right down the middle and I’ll miss the green to the left just a little Chili dip a wedge and put it all together Hit that son of a bitch right up there in the leather If you call that good and let me press on the side You can put me down for a five Oh yeah you can put me down for a five