Satan Gave Me A Taco

Satan gave me a taco and it made me really sick The chicken was all raw and the grease was mighty thick The rice was all rancid and the beans were so hard I was getting kinda dizzy eatin’ all the lard There was aphids on the lettuce and I ate every one And after I was done the salsa melted off my tongue Pieces of tortilla got stuck in my throat And the stains on my clothes burned a hole through my coat My stomach was tremblin’ and I broke out in a rash I was so dry and thirsty and I didn’t have no cash So I went and found a hose tore off all my clothes Turned on the water and it shot right up my nose Some old lady came along and she flat out was a freak So she beat me with her handbag ’til I could hardly speak I was lying there naked my body badly bruised In a pool of my own blood unconscious and confused When the cops came and got me and threw me in their van And I woke up on the ceiling and I couldn’t find my hand They took me to the judge his eyes were glowing red The courtroom was filled with witches and the dead The sheriff was a hell-hound with fangs and claws The prisoners were tied up and chained to the walls The air was getting thick the smoke was getting thicker The judge read the verdict said Cut off his head Well they placed me on the altar they raised up the axe My head was about to explode when I noticed the Marshall stacks I noticed all the smoke machines cameras and lights Some guy with a microphone runnin’ around dancin’ in tights  and I noticed The crew and the band playin’ down below And I realized I was in a rock ’n’ roll video So I went and joined the band and I went out on tour And I smoked a lot of heroin and I passed out in manure I made out with the groupies started fires backstage Made a lot of money and I gave it all away Well the band got killed so I started a solo career And I won all the awards and I drank all the beer I opened up a taco stand just to smell the smell Cookin’ with the devil fryin’ down in hell