The Talkin' Song Repair Blues

Intro: ()  () The mech()anic raised up from under my hood   He () shook his head and said "This ain’t good   Your () timin’ belt’s done sh()runk one size too () small   Those spark plug wires are a little too long   And your () main prodsponder’s nearly gone   Your in(Bm)jector ports are () stripped and that ain’t () all"   "The () torque converter’s runnin’ low on torque   And that () water pump’s nearly down a quart   But we () caught it all in () time so you’re in () luck"   He said "I’ve got the time and I’ve got the parts   Just () give me the word and I’m ready to start   I () think we can bring her () in for eight () hundred bucks"   But () don’t be down(D)hearted I can () fix it () for you () sonny   () It won’t take () too long it’ll () just () take () money   ---KEY CHANGE--- Then he said () "Ain’t you that songwriter guy?"   I () said "Yes I am" he said "So am I"   And he () sat down and played me a () song by the grease rack ()   When he finished singin’ he gave me a smile   And I () closed my eyes and pondered awhile   And he said () "What do you think?   () Now don’t hold nothin’ () back"   Well I gave him my most sorrowful look   And I said () "This song’s got a broken hook   I can () order you a new one from () Nashville but it won’t be () cheap   And I know you’ve been using a cut-rate thesaurus   ’Cause your () adverbs have backed up into your chorus   Now your () verse is runnin’ on () verbs that are way too () weak"   But () don’t be down(D#)hearted I can () fix it () for you () sonny   () It won’t take () too long it’ll () just () take () money   ---KEY CHANGE--- And I said () "Hold on friend now I’m not through   I () hate to be the one to give you the news   But your () whole melodic () structure’s worked itself () loose   It’s got so many dotted eighth notes in it   I’d () keep her under fifty beats per minute   I mean () that’s just me talkin’ () it’s really up to () you"   And you’ve got a bad safety problem with   That () dominant chord with the augmented fifth   Just () see how dangerously () high it raises you () up   So just () go on over there and work on my car   I’ll () sit here by the fan and chances are   I can () straighten this thing out for () eig...nine hundred bucks"   But () don’t be down()hearted I can () fix it () for you () sonny   () It won’t take () too long  () () (N.C.) You guessed it   () It may be a hit   I like it